First Date


Like a first date, this intro holds high odds for turning socially awkward at any moment.

That’s okay, it can’t be helped. Faced with infinite virtual continents of empty space devoted only to the word-spew I fill it with is an awkward place to be. It’s like a mind mirror, but instead of the sanctuary of my bathroom vanity, I’ve decided to make it a mission to park that sucker in front of the biggest crowd I can find. So, hey. How’s it going.

This is not my first or second draft attempt to introduce an “EVERY REASON I GOT ME A BLOG AND THE STUFF I’LL TRY TO BLOG ABOUT” uber-compression of what is really an ultimately too-erratic, elusive mess of an explanation. I’m really bad at trying to explain big things in a space with no defined boundaries. Scrambling to answer questions I’m only assuming the average person who finds this thing would ask has turned me into the typist equivalent of (the lovable!) Tremors’ bunker-hunkering, ammo-hoarding, apocalypse-defying Burt Gummer. Except, I suspect I won’t be bedeviled by prehistoric internet worms to validate my paranoid preparations.

In fact, why do I think I need to give an introduction at all? I started a blog. Because. It will be about stuff. (If you look into that mirror now, pretty sure  you’ll see that I’m just not wired in a way that will let me start any damn thing without building a frame first.) So just hang in there and I’ll feed my compulsion real quick, we can both go home for the night, and you can decide if you want to call me again.

Well, If I’m Wearing The Chef’s Hat, Here’s The Soup:

“Why start a blog?” It’s the way of the future (shoot, it’s the king of today!) and I’m sick of being a comments-section forum dweller. That’s a wildly unsatisfying vehicle for making virtual connections, finding a supportive community, or backing up personal dialogue with any kind of identity. I love and loathe the stage of puberty that the internet is growing through right now in regards to the fact that its possibilities are mind-boggling and endless but, having had to start over and learn how to interact with each other in this format of lawless etiquette but gifted the chance to talk about literally anything, we are stuck mucking around with clubs and caps lock on the evolutionary scale.

I’m over trying to engage about things I have big feelings for only to get swallowed up or distracted away before I can get any feedback or satisfaction from the energy I put into thinking things through.  Here I can meander, expound, implore, edit! It will be great for me and all, but my biggest hope is that I find a few people to join me.

“For all that grandiosity, what the hell do you plan to blog about?” Most likely and right away? Horror movies, all ri-i-ight. Hit the ground running with your reverent fanaticism, that’s what I say! (But really, I love those things and the world [wide web] can always use another craggy haven for others who share that passion.)

Also: tropes, specific political happenstances, feminism by a feminist who doesn’t understand a lot of the other prominent online feminists, Stephen King, probably my cat once or twice, what happens when I travel, the new song I discovered that iTunes tells me I have listened to over 40 times in one day because it’s that. damn. good., observing gross hypocrisy from the desk of an HR grunt in supermarket retail, youtube adventures,and SO MUCH MORE!

Here’s My Number…

Well, now you know. Even if you didn’t ask. Maybe you cruised down here because reading a few posts gave you growing concern about my agenda. Maybe I just wrecked the chances that you’ll read any further. If you do stick around and have any thoughts on anything that comes up, please consider sharing if you think it’s appropriate or feel like being heard. If you have any suggestions for a post, share that too! I’m not hurting for ideas–day to day motivation, absolutely, but not ideas–but if you take nothing else from this introduction when you go, I hope I’ve adequately impressed that I love a good frame for ideas.

So, uh, yeah! Thanks for your time! See you around, maybe.